I have visitors arriving on Sunday. The visitors are my brother and father. Decent folks but visitors always stress me out. I’m not sure why. It’s probably because I have to clean and entertain. Entertaining isn’t so bad. Cleaning, on the other hand, is not my forte. I’m a bachelor. Nuff said.

In order to deal with this dilemma I’ve come up with a daily list chores. Yeah that’s geeky but if I don’t plan this out I’ll spend all day Saturday inventing new curse words (that actually happens to be a forte). So far, everything is going according to plan because my Monday chore was to come up with a list of chores for Tuesday through Saturday. Brilliant.

Unfortunately, this has put my dreams of cream cheese on hold. So here I am fantasizing about dairy while I mop the floors. Well, hopefully I’ll mop the floors. Just because I made the list doesn’t mean I’ll stick to it. I’m good at improvising (forte number two).

Thus ends another exciting chapter in my quest for sobriety.